WARNING!...TROOPERS JOKES..MAY NOT BE SUITABLE FOR YOUNG-INS AND THE TENDER AT HEART
Alan Benoit sends along this observation. BB
INTERESTING FACTS ABOUT SEX:
FACT:
79,000,000 people are engaged in sex - right now.
FACT:
58,000,000 are kissing.
FACT:
37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex.
FACT:
1 old timer is reading emails.
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Ouch!!! Damn that hurts, from Bill Bowker. BB
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Thanks to Fred Currier this bit of Knowledge. BB
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Here's one Sent in by Smokey. BB
One December day we found an old straggly cat at our door. She was a sorry sight, starving, dirty, smelled terrible, skinny, and hair all matted down.
We felt sorry for her so we put her in a carrier and took her to the vet. We didn't know what to call her so we named her 'Pussycat.'
The vet decided to keep her for a day or so he said he would let us know when we could come and get her.
My husband (the complainer) said, “OK, but don't forget to wash her, she stinks.” He reminded the vet that it was his WIFE (me) that wanted the dirty cat, not him.
My husband and my Vet don't see eye to eye.
The vet calls my husband 'El-Cheap-O', and my husband calls the vet 'El-Charge-O’. They love to hate each other and constantly 'snipe' at one another, with my husband getting in the last word on this particular occasion.
The next day my husband had an appointment with his doctor, who is located in the same building, next door to the vet..
The MD's waiting room and office was full of people waiting to see the doctor. A side door opened and the vet leaned in - he had obviously seen my husband arrive.
He looked straight at my husband and in a loud voice said, ”Your wife's pussy doesn't stink any more. We washed and shaved it, and now she smells like a rose. Oh, and, by the way, I think she's pregnant. God only knows who the father is!” Then he closed the door.
Now THAT, my friends, is getting even!
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John Venerio found a good one. BB
Well, it's finally happened....
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..Here is some good advice from Jeff Kramer BB
Sometimes when you are angry with someone,
It helps to sit down,
take a moment to cool off,
and think about the problem.
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Here's something we all need under our belt. Sent in by Dan Thompson. BB
All 60 yrs and older. Cardiovascular Health-Simple Exercise
Scroll Down
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.
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NOW SCROLL UP.
That's enough for the first day. Great job.
Now go Have a beer.
You'll like this one sent in by Howard Greenfield. BB
Two 90-year-old women, Rose and Barb had been friends all of their lives.
When it was clear that Rose was dying, Barb visited her every day.
One day Barb said, 'Rose, we both loved playing women's softball all our lives, and we played all through High School. Please do me one favor: when you get to Heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's women's softball there.'
Rose looked up at Barb from her deathbed and said, 'Barb, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favor for you.'
Shortly after that, Rose passed on.
A few nights later, Barb was awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to her, 'Barb, Barb.'
'Who is it?', asked Barb, sitting up suddenly. 'Who is it?'
'Barb -- it's me, Rose.'
'You're not Rose. Rose just died.'
'I'm telling you, it's me, Rose,' insisted the voice.
'Rose! Where are you?'
'In Heaven,' replied Rose. 'I have some really good news and a little bad news.'
'Tell me the good news first,' said Barb.
'The good news,' Rose said, 'is that there's softball in Heaven. Better yet all of our old buddies who died before us are here, too..
Better than that, we're all young again. Better still, it's always springtime, and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play softball all we want, and we never get tired.'
'That's fantastic,' said Barb. 'It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad news?'
'You're pitching Tuesday.'
source
http://www.quarterhorsecav.org/WEEK2.htm
WELCOME TO OLE' BILL'S WEEKLY NEWSLETTER
April 2010 - Week 2
You'll like this one sent in by Howard Greenfield. BB
Two 90-year-old women, Rose and Barb had been friends all of their lives.
When it was clear that Rose was dying, Barb visited her every day.
One day Barb said, 'Rose, we both loved playing women's softball all our lives, and we played all through High School. Please do me one favor: when you get to Heaven, somehow you must let me know if there's women's softball there.'
Rose looked up at Barb from her deathbed and said, 'Barb, you've been my best friend for many years. If it's at all possible, I'll do this favor for you.'
Shortly after that, Rose passed on.
A few nights later, Barb was awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to her, 'Barb, Barb.'
'Who is it?', asked Barb, sitting up suddenly. 'Who is it?'
'Barb -- it's me, Rose.'
'You're not Rose. Rose just died.'
'I'm telling you, it's me, Rose,' insisted the voice.
'Rose! Where are you?'
'In Heaven,' replied Rose. 'I have some really good news and a little bad news.'
'Tell me the good news first,' said Barb.
'The good news,' Rose said, 'is that there's softball in Heaven. Better yet all of our old buddies who died before us are here, too..
Better than that, we're all young again. Better still, it's always springtime, and it never rains or snows. And best of all, we can play softball all we want, and we never get tired.'
'That's fantastic,' said Barb. 'It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad news?'
'You're pitching Tuesday.'
source
http://www.quarterhorsecav.org/WEEK2.htm
WELCOME TO OLE' BILL'S WEEKLY NEWSLETTER
April 2010 - Week 2
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